to the self-love ones

“Research on loneliness has been hampered by its strong association with depression. The two states frequently co-occur, and measures of the two states are substantially correlated.” One of the primal causes of depression in our generation is the feeling of loneliness. It’s the lack-luster feeling in the belief that; no one knows how you feel, “no one understands me”. Hence, we post things like “good vibes only”, “haters hate”, “self-love”. But wait, are you not supposed to love yourself? If you have to tell the world ‘constantly’ that you love yourself, it could be a projection of your insecurities and a subtle but desperate quest in seeking the attention of those that aren’t even looking.

Matthew 22:37–39 (AMP) And He replied to him, you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind (intellect). This is the great (most important, principal) and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as [you do] yourself.

Jesus was teaching about the two of the greatest commandments there is; our love for God and love for our neighbours. This excerpt of scripture also elusively states that the proof of God’s love at work in us is in how we love others. This I believe is what we have mistaken for ‘self-love’. We back this up by quoting out of context, Matthew 7:5 “You hypocrite, first get the beam of timber out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the tiny particle out of your brother’s eye.” This scripture, however, was written concerning judging others that we must first carry out a heart check to ensure we are in a position to correct and properly guide others.

If you really claim to be “self-loved” then you may be in error. It could suggest that the love at work in you is self-generated and that could be a reason for your selfishness and unhappiness and this shows that our self-generated love isn’t even enough for us. If you, however, can accept and believe that you are “God-loved” then you will be at peace with yourself and well able to love others in spite of their display of foolishness. It is not automatic as you will need to consciously work on it.

Ecclesiastes 12:13 (AMP) All has been heard; the end of the matter is: Fear God [revere and worship Him, knowing that He is] and keep His commandments, for this is the whole of man [the full, original purpose of his creation, the object of God’s providence, the root of character, the foundation of all happiness, the adjustment to all inharmonious circumstances and conditions under the sun] and the whole [duty] for every man.

If you feel offended about the above statement, then it could either be that you created the world or you were lied to that America did. Our worship of God is our response to his love for us.

Do you not think that you have spent your life living selfishly (worshiping yourself) because we have been taught through experience and without revelation that the world reeks only of cruelty? We have gotten so into ourselves that we don’t even see the hurt we cause others. We refuse to show kindness to the needy because we have concluded that life is meant to be hard. We sing about how it; we make memes about it; we build schools of thought around this. Its an error in reasoning that the best way to live life is to live unto yourself. Your confidence should be in the realization that the most important personality in the cosmos is in love with you!

1 John 4:19 (AMP) We love Him, because He first loved us.

My dear friend, love your neighbours; even when they act like they don’t have any sense in their heads, it could be that they have also been fooled into the ‘self-love’ shenanigan. Show them kindness without expecting any severance. A proof that God’s love dwells richly in you is when you stop asking… “what about me?” because the love of God shed abroad in our hearts if allowed, will be so much satisfaction to us that it will spill to others around. Our worship of God is revealed in our service to sometimes undeserving men. A life spent loving is one worth living. Be the first to love.

Bolu Olatunji

Pray like this: Lord, thank you for loving me.